I’m at the point in my life where I realize how much is suppose to be kept to yourself. The secrets that are whispered in grade 2 are no longer the same secrets that I try to hide currently. These ones can ruin relationships, friendships, and ultimately myself. Sadly, I’ve never been great at keeping secrets. Looking back, I’ve never had to keep a secret from those close to me…and now, I don’t know how to do it.
This is quite bothersome since I don’t necessary want to share this with the world, but at the same time, I can’t help but feel like this is a major milestone in my life that those close around me should know. I don’t want them to find out through another means other than myself in the future. This builds doubt and trust issues.
I want to let them know, but I want to save the friendships as well. It’s at times like these that I wish I can look to the future and realize that actions have consequences. Perhaps the consequence of this is that I have to suffer the secrecy, knowing that the guilt attacks are from none other than myself.
Let laughter cover , but never forget.